Everyone is at the cool kids table this week
So here is what happened, last week I wrote a usual Five Things and then I accidentally sent it to paid subscribers only. But I didn’t realize this until Tuesday and I am nothing if not committed to the 8pm Sunday send out time. This week everyone is getting the “camp counselors hanging out at the picnic table eating candy after lights out” version of the newsletter as a gift from me to you.
If you would like to get this every month (and now other membership perks!), sign up to become a paid subscriber below.
I’ve opened last week’s issue back up to everyone, and you can read that here.
This sentence now has links to the my instagram, and old issues of the newsletter.
Number One: Five Things now has Merch!
A couple months back I talked to Lucy Manning about updating the graphics for Five Things since I made the switch to Substack and now I’m making money on this newsletter, so we out here pursuing excellence. I can’t remember if she suggested it, or I did, but the topic of stickers came up. She whipped up some designs and e-mailed them to me in a zip file that I forgot to look at for a couple of days. But when I did I got a little misty.
Writing this newsletter is so much fun for me each week. It has made me think beyond the basic to come up with things that are interesting and inspiring and worthwhile. I don’t know, sometimes a cynicism creeps in that says that life is just a series of unmet expectations, and this newsletter has helped me push back on that in a major way. And it means the world to me that people read it, and that there are even people that are willing to support it with their dollars. And something about stickers with bikes on them made me feel so known and loved, and I am just excited about it all.
So here’s the scuttlebutt:
There are stickers and there are magnets - the magnets are the green circles pictured below, stickers are the bikes. I’ll say it, when the magnets came in the mail, I was like, this is the weakest looking magnet I have ever seen. But they are strong enough to hold a Christmas card to your fridge. You could even use the magnet to hold the sticker to the hard drive on your work computer, but that seems unwise.
Sign up here for me to mail a sticker or a magnet or both. Paying subscribers can have as many as they want included as a bonus perk with the subscription. If you’re just a free e-mailer, venmo me $5.
The goal is to get these in your mail box by 8pm next Sunday.
Thank you to Lilly, Shannon, Mary Elizabeth, Morgan, and Meg for being in a group text of strangers and serving as a focus group! I am learning just how indecisive I am, and I grateful for the folks that ride that wave with me.
I will tell Lucy to get to work on designing the “Bros of the Newsletter” crewneck sweatshirt when we hit 450 regular email subscribers. Closer than you think, but go ahead and tell your friends to sign up anyway.
Number Two: The smell of cigarettes in the morning
Yesterday I was on a walk with my friend Becca and her dog Otie, and we walked behind a woman taking in her morning cigarette for a minute or so. It was one of those mornings where is was just foggy and chilly enough that the smell made me feel like I was in Europe. Or Pittsburgh. Or some other place where public schools haven’t put the fear of God in the minds of every child via the “kissing a smoker is like licking an ash tray” classroom poster. Just a good, nostalgic smell.
Number Three: Feeling Senti about West Plaza
I’ve been doing this thing where Saturday mornings I get intentional about feeling inspired. To say it’s been life-giving would be a gross understatement.
Saturday morning I walked to Hi-Hat Coffee, and I found myself thinking, “I never ever ever want to live anywhere that I cannot walk to Hi-Hat for iced coffee and a muffin on a Saturday morning, can’t do it, won’t do it.” This sentiment stands in direct opposition my dream of one day living across the street from that one tennis court in Brookside. Or my other dream of one day living somewhere where I can park my Honda Odyssey in the garage easily - I can’t wait to drive a minivan. Or living somewhere where the hills are reasonable enough to bike on. Theoretically, there are garages big enough in Westwood, and there is a tennis court there, and good public schools… still walking distance to Hi-Hat. Right now the only house in Westwood for sale right now is split-level, and not in a “raised ranch” way, and isn’t in the budget. I digress…
Number Four: Camping as Protest
In February a bunch of tents went up near what I would call one of the most poorly-designed intersections known to man in Kansas City. I drive past Camp 6ixx most days and my feelings about it feel complicated mostly because I want to be compassionate, and I know there’s so much I don’t know, but if I’m being honest, in my heart of hearts, I hate feeling guilty. And for me, at least, there’s a strange guilt when I am reminded that my neighbors are hurting, and selfishly I would rather just live in a world where I don’t feel guilty.
Anyway, this piece from the Kansas City Star was surprisingly thought provoking. The summary is that many in the KC homeless community are frustrated by the resources provided for them so they are protesting by camping in big numbers in very visible places.
The solution is messier and more expensive and will take longer than any one wants. But that’s probably true of more things than we would like.
Number Five: Grover Cleveland Secret Surgery and other articles that didn’t make the newsletter this month and laser hair removal
Grover Cleveland had surgery on a moving yacht when he was president, and this is a story that is interesting to me.
Your plants aren’t actually cleaning the air in your home, but it’s still nice to think about.
This guy spent his MLK Day bailing people out of jail for non-violent crimes. A true love-to-see-it.
I really do miss HEB and their Texas-shaped tortilla chips.
I bought this Groupon for laser hair removal which will either turn out to be the deal of lifetime or not. Stay tuned.
Lastly, It’s 4 O’Clock Somewhere, our beloved Lizzie McGuire recap podcast is officially off-air. Bittersweet, but still backed up to an external hard drive in case Lilly or I ever need to reference our conversation on this important conversation.